Here we go

How to begin? I got laid off from a job I poured my heart and soul into, and five days later my maternal grandfather died. No burying the lead here.

I process my world through writing. I am writing constantly, every single day, in my journal or the notes app on my phone. Thoughts I don’t want to forget, ideas that could benefit my business, new perspectives I’m learning as I go. I’ve been called to share my writing for a while but have been held back by the fear of getting it wrong. My reliance on perfectionism has been a hindrance to me, and my fear of sharing myself publicly has held me back from taking action.

This is terrifying. Living on that thin line between nervousness and excitement. Writing this is giving me low-level nausea. There are so many fears. This is me screaming, roaring, clearing my throat. Releasing the weight of all the compulsory rules I’ve felt I had to follow. Releasing the limits I’ve put on myself and my voice. And I think it’ll feel really, really good on the other side.

I want to share my journey through grief – layoff grief, familial grief, the collective grief of civilization in 2023, grief of the dying fraying split ends of the journalism industry (note here: we’re being called to evolve), and general musings about the things I know to be right and the things I want to learn more about. There is beauty in cracking yourself open and letting your heart shine.

So come with me on this journey of self discovery, as I navigate unwinding a lifetime of tension in my body. Building the courage to share my private thoughts with vulnerability. I have a lot to say and up to this point, I have been afraid to share on this scale. But hopefully my words will be able to help someone else as they navigate a layoff, or grief, or questioning their career path. Maybe it will just share the perspective of a 28-year old woman with a lot on her mind. Regardless, we are moving gracefully through the fear of needing to be perfect.